Silver Lining

Alumna turns a health crisis into an opportunity

By Jeannine Walston '95

After working for a congressman on Capitol Hill for over a year, I needed a break from Washington, D.C. When I was offered a position as finance director on a congressional campaign in Idaho with the potential to double my salary, I decided to embrace the opportunity.

Two weeks before my scheduled departure, however, I started feeling dizzy. I visited a general practitioner, who sent me to an ear specialist. The specialist ordered a precautionary MRI, which revealed a brain tumor. And there I’d been, an invincible 24-year-old.

After consulting various neuro-oncologists and neurosurgeons, I was given three choices: I could monitor the activity of the tumor, have a biopsy, or undergo surgery to remove the tumor. The health crisis, I was told, was grave — it could lead to paralysis, cognitive impairment, or even death.

It was not an intellectual decision — I simply could not fathom living with a mass in my brain and such uncertainty. I decided to have brain surgery. While I waited, I found I could stand only brief telephone conversations with my parents in New Jersey and brother, John, then an Ithaca College senior; their concern brought my fears to the surface.

While some of my friends were incapable of dealing with my situation, many extended strong support — at a level that was new to me and sometimes awkward to accept. My exchanges with friends and loved ones became intensely meaningful. Time passed not in days or hours, but in moments.

On April 22, 1998, my doctors successfully removed a low-grade glioma from the temporal lobe of my brain. I returned home a week after surgery; my mom stayed to monitor my recuperation. In the stillness I became aware of the quality of my individual friendships: some had strengthened, others had faltered. I made new friends through support groups and brain tumor organizations.

A month after the surgery I returned to work. Everything was different. It was a challenge to operate within the pace on Capitol Hill when I felt vulnerable most of the time. I felt as if no one could relate to my experience — one I hardly understood myself.

Surprisingly, though, as time went by I started to value my vulnerability. I discovered that I enjoyed existing with a balance between my head and my heart. I had been taught how to think at Ithaca College and elsewhere, but now I was learning to feel.

My health crisis has offered me a profound opportunity. I now believe there was no other way for me to discover my unique purpose in life. While that purpose continues to define itself, I know it relates to health care, natural healing, and patient advocacy. But it goes deeper than simply a career. It is about being true to myself, feeling gratitude, focusing on my family, putting energy into my relationships, being dedicated to learning, and living with a commitment to becoming a better person.

Jeannine Walston ’95 is still working as a legislative aide for a congressman and is preparing for a career change. She welcomes contact from Ithaca College alumni on the subject of her tumor or other topics.