Last Friday morning, IC's resident assistants were treated to a graphic demonstration of the dangers that fires pose in residence halls.

The Ithaca fire department was on hand to host a controlled burn of what might pass for a typical dorm room. Thanks to a grant from the Ithaca Landlords Association, a special "burn pod" was assembled and stocked with furniture, such as a chair, desk, clothes, a tapestry, and so forth.

After some remarks about the importance of fire safety from Tim Ryan, environmental health and safety manager at Ithaca College, and deputy fire chief Tom Parsons, the real fun began. Parsons dropped a lit votive candle into a garbage can full of papers and newspapers and let nature take its course.

Within a minute, the room had caught fire in dramatic fashion. And within seven minutes, the entire pod was ablaze, top to bottom. City firefighters were on standby from the first moment, ready to step in and hose out the flames.

Check out the photo gallery at right to see a time-lapse series of pictures.

I know it was nigh on impossible to tear yourselves away from a summer full of awkward moments with high school friends who think "you've changed, man" and repeated explanations to your parents about the sociopolitical significance of assorted piercings and tattoos, but in time I suspect you'll be glad you returned to Ithaca.

In fact, since this is probably the last weekend (sprits willing) many of you will see your parents for many moons, I think it would be sweet if you shared a little local culture with them this evening. Think of it as family bonding, Ithaca-style.

I'm referring, of course, to the SufferJets roller derby bout at Cass Park tonight. First jam starts at 7:30; first dental projectile at 7:31.

Having traveled the world in pursuit of the finer things in life, I can say without hesitation that few artistic endeavors offer so poignant an encapsulation of humanity's beautiful potential than 10 rough-and-tumble gals -- many working on graduate degrees between blood-lettings -- whomping the ever-loving snot out of one another while skating in a big oval. Ithaca is easily one of the smallest cities in the country with its own roller derby team, which is a testament to our collective will to excel...or a damning indictment of a morally dubious band of rogues masquerading as an enlightened community. To-may-toe, to-mah-toe.

Anyway, think of this as an unofficial welcome back to all that is weird and wonderful about life at Ithaca College. Our community may be a little different, but then who wants to be ordinary?