I know it was nigh on impossible to tear yourselves away from a summer full of awkward moments with high school friends who think "you've changed, man" and repeated explanations to your parents about the sociopolitical significance of assorted piercings and tattoos, but in time I suspect you'll be glad you returned to Ithaca.

In fact, since this is probably the last weekend (sprits willing) many of you will see your parents for many moons, I think it would be sweet if you shared a little local culture with them this evening. Think of it as family bonding, Ithaca-style.

I'm referring, of course, to the SufferJets roller derby bout at Cass Park tonight. First jam starts at 7:30; first dental projectile at 7:31.

Having traveled the world in pursuit of the finer things in life, I can say without hesitation that few artistic endeavors offer so poignant an encapsulation of humanity's beautiful potential than 10 rough-and-tumble gals -- many working on graduate degrees between blood-lettings -- whomping the ever-loving snot out of one another while skating in a big oval. Ithaca is easily one of the smallest cities in the country with its own roller derby team, which is a testament to our collective will to excel...or a damning indictment of a morally dubious band of rogues masquerading as an enlightened community. To-may-toe, to-mah-toe.

Anyway, think of this as an unofficial welcome back to all that is weird and wonderful about life at Ithaca College. Our community may be a little different, but then who wants to be ordinary?