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Posted by Marc Phillips at 1:11PM   |  Add a comment
Emily

 

With the transition from home life to college life a common question that many students have is: “how often should I be calling home?”

I’m a sophomore and looking back on my first year I have learned a lot about how often to call home. I live about 45 minutes from Ithaca, so for many of you that probably sounds quite close. Here’s the thing though, whether Ithaca is 20 minutes or 20 hours from your home, calling home is something we all have to deal with.  

During my first semester I will admit, I did not call home as much as I probably should have. Even though I live semi close to home, my family still misses me. I was really focused with getting involved on campus, keeping my grades up, going out on weekends and meeting new people, because for me it was a new adventure. However, while I was doing all these new and exciting things my family was living their regular routine life, just without me. I didn’t notice them as much as I should have and if I could go back, I would have called more that semester. 

Now that I am through my first year I understand why I acted the way that I did. I didn’t want to be the girl that couldn’t handle being on her own, so keeping myself busy was a way to avoid feeling lonely and needing to call my parents.  

I understand that it’s okay to call your family and talk to them, that doesn’t mean you can’t handle living on your own, it just means you love them. I still enjoy being busy, but calling my mom on that ten minute break between classes lets her know I’m thinking of her and brings peace to my mind.  

On the flip side of things, calling home too much is not good either because you do need to establish a new sense of independence. Leaning on your parents for every detail of your life will stunt your metaphorical growth. 

My answer to the big question isn’t something like “you should call home 2.5 hours every 2 days” or some crazy statistic like that, instead it is simply: whatever you find necessary.

If you need to talk to your mom every day, then call her every day and if you would like to start calling her less, then maybe try setting a goal to call her every other day. Everyone has a different experience with calling home. Some need it more than others, but the most important thing is that you do it as much as YOU need/want to given your life and relationships with your family.


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